Lost Property

"Not until we are lost do we begin to find ourselves."

Thoreau

Old Age

I was thinking into the future the other day and had this vision:

Nurse: "Mr Thomas! What are you doing?"
Me: "It's Sunday morning and I'm taking the dogs a walk."
Nurse: "Mr Thomas, it's Tuesday, you have no dogs and you're in another patient's bedroom."

So be it.

Discovery and the art of seeing

"Discovery consists of seeing what everybody has seen and thinking what nobody has thought."

Albert von Szent-Gyorgyi (1893 - 1986)

"I think this applies both to artists and scientists (BT)

Ellen DeGeneres

"In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better."


"I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves."

"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is."


Ellen DeGeneres US comedian and actress

Religious Hatred

"I was walking across a bridge one day and I saw a man about to jump. I said,
'Stop, don't do it.'
'Why shouldn't I?' he asked.
'Well, are you Christian?' I asked. He said:
'Yes.' I said,
'Me too. Are you Catholic or Protestant?'
'Protestant.'
'Me too. Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?'
'Baptist.'
'Wow, me too. Are you Baptist church of God or Baptist church of the Lord?'
'Baptist Church of God. '
'Me too. Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you reformed Baptist Church of God?'
'Reformed Baptist Church of God.'
'Me too. Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?' He said,
'Reformation of 1915.' I said:
'Die, heretic scum, and pushed him off."

Emo Phillips